Making Good Habits, Breaking Bad Habits by Joyce Meyer

Where I got this book: Through Netgalley - Faithwords

Rating: ★★★★★

Synopsis: From nail biting to cell phone addiction, procrastination to overspending, bad habits seem to outnumber the good ones. Unfortunately, we pay a price for bad habits that outweighs the immediate gratification that they bring.

In this book, Joyce Meyer starts by examining the nature of habits. The first habit - and most important one to have - is the God Habit. By making it a habit to start your day by reading the Bible and communing with God, asking for His help in your efforts and His strength and sustenance, the stage is set for overcoming the habits you want to break and establishing new ones in their place.

She then explores how to break bad habits by examining the destructive negative behavior patterns.

The author moves on to discuss fourteen good habits and devotes a chapter to each. By the end of the chapter, the reader has a specific roadmap to follow until the behavior has become automatic (the definition of a habit). It's like following a GPS to get you to a new place. After traveling the same route several times, the GPS isn't needed for you to find your destination. The 'habit' of following the right route is ingrained. (Netgalley)

Year Published: April 2, 2013

My review:

Note: I read this book through Netgalley for the purpose of review.

This was definitely one of those books you NEED to read. Joyce Meyer just has a way of making you feel like she is talking to you and knows exactly what's going on in your mind and heart. I really appreciate her tough love approach and her optimism when she asserts that you can do better and that you absolutely can enjoy your life.

Reading this book showed me just how much I was holding myself back. Instead of taking life by the horns and working toward achieving our dreams, she points out that what many people do is hesitate and choose not to try because they're afraid to fail. She says that we'd be surprised how many procrastinators were actually just perfectionists who were afraid to do something and it not be good enough. That is me to T! Reading this book made me want to put it down and get off my behind and actually do the things I've always wanted to do but have been too critical of myself and too afraid of being criticized to actually try. This book instigates action and builds you up where you're saying to yourself - the only person in my way is me and the enemy who loves to get in my way. What a liberating moment when you realize that if you could just forget to think about failure and focus on achieving, God can and will make things happen for you. I'm taking this advice to heart and running with it.

Some quotes from the book that were really thought-provoking:

"If you put your faith in you or in other people, you will be disappointed, but if you put it in God you will be amazed at what He can do through you."

I think that is so poignant. Often we give other people, and even ourselves, way too much power over us. It's God that knows our potential and has the final say of what we are capable of doing. It's really liberating to think that it's only the Lord who can put limitations on us and often the ones we put on ourselves or allow others to put on us are not His. He sees far more in us than we allow for our lives.

"Remember this: God is pleased with you as long as you keep pressing on, and He is not disappointed with you because you are not perfect. Our faithlessness does not change God's faithfulness (II Timothy 2:13)."

I think this is something I need written on my refrigerator, my bathroom mirror, the homescreen on my cellphone, and maybe behind my eyelids. I am my own worst critic. Constantly, I find myself feeling defeated because my responses, actions, behavior isn't perfect. I'm not a perfect Christian. I'm not always kind when I'm frustrated, I GET frustrated, I get angry at my husband when he's bugging me even though I don't want to, and sometimes I forget to spend time with God in the morning and have to find a way to squeeze it in in the car, or at three in the afternoon, or at two o'clock in the morning. I fight with doubts, I fight with sin, I fight to be good and I fight to keep learning and focused on my spiritual life. It's a battle sometimes, and it's easy for me to imagine that God is frustrated with me. That He's throwing up his hands when I make that mistake yet again.

The recurring theme I keep finding everywhere though, is that He admires and responds to persistence. I can't feel defeated because I think he's disappointed with me when I know that He knows my heart. He knows I'm trying and that tomorrow I'm going to try some more, and then some more the next day - and while I'm never going to be as good as Jesus, I'm using him as a role model, and eventually I'll get better and better. I'm going to stop torturing myself thinking that God is ready to give up on me. I'm going to remind myself that He treasures my persistence and that He knows, better than anyone, how hard I'm trying and I'm going to take comfort in that.

"Our words affect us and the people around us. They also affect what God is able to do for us. We cannot have a negative mouth and a positive life."

Oh AMEN, Joyce! Negative words and negative thoughts can ruin your day and your mind more than anything can. I'm a firm believer that you can actually invite bad things to happen to you through worry and negativity. I feel like you're laying it out in detail for the enemy to know exactly how to make you unhappy. I am one of those people that choose to just be as annoyingly positive as I possibly can about everything. When something goes wrong, I'm already searching to find the bright side. Of course, just like everyone else, when I let myself be negative I can be really negative - especially when someone has upset me. It's why I don't like to go there - I take it to another level. It is just all the proof you need. How can God answer your prayers if you don't even believe in your heart that things are going to get better? This has to be why it's a sin to worry, because it goes against your belief system. Having faith means trusting God - and if you're only looking on the gloomy side of things, you’re not trusting God at all.

“Quite often we are our own worst enemy. We may want to be involved in everything that everyone we know is involved in, but it may not be best for us. If you follow wisdom you may end up peaceful while everyone you know is stressed from hurrying.”

This is something I think really resonates with me because I think our society glorifies more, more, more and hurry, hurry, hurry. While that works for a lot of people, and so many are able to perform on that rat race of life – the Lord didn’t intend that for everyone. In fact, so many people are miserable and on anti-depressants or just aren’t coping with life because theirs is totally out of control. How can you smell the roses? How can you enjoy being with the people you love? How can you function when you’ve got a hundred things to be thinking about and worrying about? What ever happened to the slower, family-oriented pace of life? Where people worked or kept their homes and spent their evenings together loving on one another?

I read something the other day that said, “Stop the glorification of busy.” I really liked that because our culture really does glorify those who take up every moment of their lives with doing something. People that are over-busy are seen as important, more together, more functional – people to be admired. Never mind that they’re extremely unhappy and probably medicated or in need of medication to cope with their lives. Never mind that their personal and spiritual lives are in shambles because they don’t have enough minutes in the day to take the time to build and nurture those relationships! Joyce also said something to the effect of, “If you’re too busy to spend time with God, you’re probably doing too much.” Essentially, God doesn’t want you so overloaded you don’t have time for Him or yourself or anyone else.

“God is not in a hurry, we are likely to run right past Him and then wonder where He went. Learn to live in God’s divine rhythm.”

This really spoke to me. Sometimes we forget that our God is not a genie. We can’t rub a lamp and make wishes and poof! they’re answered. God’s time isn’t ours. Sometimes we have prayed and prayed for something so long ago that when it actually gets answered we don’t even remember we’ve prayed and prayed for this.

Example: A year or so ago my husband was in a terrible job where he was mistreated and overworked. Sometimes pay day would roll around and he wouldn’t get a check because the company couldn’t manage money well. He was owed thousands of dollars in expenses, we had no insurance, and he was always travelling. Yet, he had a job and so many people were struggling it seemed irresponsible for him to leave without having something else lined up. We prayed and prayed that he would find something else, something with insurance, something where he was treated better, something where his expenses were paid promptly and something comparable to his pay then. That prayer was a doosy. It took a couple of stepping stone jobs, a failed job interview, turning down another job, and a pay cut or two for that prayer to finally be answered.

Now, over a year later, he’s working for a company that treats him so well, he spends a good deal of time working from home, has free insurance for the both of us, his expenses are non-existent, and a company vehicle. Recently we got word that he would be receiving a pay raise every quarter until it was back up close to where we were before. What a blessing! But so much time had passed, we had forgotten how much we had prayed for this, and failed to realize that our prayer had been exactly answered, even as a process. Then, one day we were in the car and it just came to us. The Lord had answered every single one of our prayers. Every single one of them! When you believe, when you pray, when you knock at the door, God listens, and He remembers. Just because He’s not on our time-frame doesn’t mean the answer is no, it just means we have to be patient. To slow down and listen. To wait for Him. I really liked this quote for that reason. It reminds me when I’m praying and praying and pouring my heart out, that my Father is listening and that He is answering if I will just slow down and let him.

Needless to say, this book was a blessing to read and it really got me thinking about the bad habits I have and what I can do to improve. I know I have a lot to work on, but I have the ultimate one on my side to encourage and guide and push me to excellence if I am willing to let Him do His work in my life. I just have to stop resisting and being afraid. Fear has no place with God. He is the best comforter, protector, and encourager. I’m so thankful I read this book because it reminds me of how much life I could be living. I think this is one that deserves more than one read because there is so much to be gotten out of it. If I could give it more than five stars, I would.

Thanks to Joyce, yet again, for the incredible insight!